walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He shit in the fireplace
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
