So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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