Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
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