we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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