He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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