He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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