Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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