You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
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