And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
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