Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
