i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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