Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.