If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
