ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize