Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
We should try that some time.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.