It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
