best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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