just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
