There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize