is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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