Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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