escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
