Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I just want nice things and good sex
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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