He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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