ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
