you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
