I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."