Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.