I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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