i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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