Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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