I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize