I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Apparently you make a good broom.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
