Where is the hickey?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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