when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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