So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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