it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
