it wasn't lemon gatorade
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize