Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
