you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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