That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
