names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
