oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
