He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
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The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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