So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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