Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
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you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
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You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
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