Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
