I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
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