Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
