Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize