I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize