he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
